Thoughts

Strange it is to realise today that Sqk has been with us for 3 months and I have 6 months of my planned leave left. Where has the time gone although it does seem like he has been here for longer and we are finding it increasingly difficult to remember life before he arrived. So far we seem to have been lucky on Planet Adoption with a son who has bonded to us and is seeing us as a secure base. I know it is still early days but reading his SW’s words in Annex A brought it all home again. We’ve had an interesting start to the new year with meeting his birth parents and his foster carer & foster siblings again for the first time in 12 weeks. Obviously Sqk was with us at the latter and in the care of my sister for the former. He did very well given I had left him for 30 minutes before with my mother once so this was only his second time with neither Mummy or Daddy there. However he loves both his cousins and has got to spend quite a bit of time with them and his aunt. Due to birth parents mucking us around over meeting time my sister parked outside our house, walked Sqk and her two to school (her elder child is in school – her younger child was in the buggy) and then bringing younger 2 back here and then to her house. Apparently he was a bit weepy coming back to our house, but then got excited by seeing their dog. His elder cousin excitedly chattered away about school on way there and promptly introduced his cousin to everyone there. Which is a good thing as Sqk starts (childminder search permitting) nursery there in September. We had some processing in sleep again after this but only one disturbed night really. Then a few days later (last Sunday) Sqk met up with his ‘Nanny’ (FC) and her 2 long-term foster kids. We did this in local soft play place which was very busy but he remembered them all and was really glad to see them. Had to remind his eldest foster-sister that he is growing up so didn’t need his hand holding all the time. However all in all a good meeting and Sqk was happy enough to come away with us. Yes we’ve had conversations about Nanny this week and we’ve been consistent in telling him that he will see her again. Again processing in his sleep – we were woken in early hours by loud cries Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday nights, but he didn’t wake himself so got back to sleep fairly quickly. Big event this week has been another social worker visit along with a doctor’s appointments & various groups. As I commented to our SW, he is becoming a little boy before our eyes – very much a toddler still when he arrived, but he has shot up in height and become much steadier on his feet. The last couple of weeks he has been holding his spoon pretty much correctly and his speech is coming along. Both DH and I feel he has settled in with us and we both love him so much. Yesterday Grannie & Grandpa came for the day (my in-laws)and Sqk is really starting to recognise them. We spent some time wandering around big park in next city (we went there during Intros) and he had a great time playing on the equipment. Once again proving he is a climber…..

Once back at home Sqk was interacting really well with his grandparents – so much so Daddy & I were able to be in kitchen for a while without him immediately coming to find us. He was very clingy at the start of this week needing lots of reassurance and kisses & cuddles but that has lessened as the week has gone on and as he has processed meeting his FC again. Second LAC review in less than 3 weeks, and we will be asked about Adoption Order. Contrary to the friendly advice (from other adopters given Sqk’s age-he is 2.5) we have been given to hold off for a while longer I suspect we may go for it. We have his later-life letter and know his lifestory book is basically there – as I commented at an AUK support meeting we fell on our feet with his SW. She has been really efficient from writing her part of the matching panel paperwork in less than a week to getting her part of Annex A (for court hearing over AO) and his later life letter done before she went on maternity leave yesterday. Plus she has been his SW since he was put on child protection register pre-birth so knows him very well and is delighted to see him with us. Now waiting to see who comes for the LAC review from child social work team – our SW suspects we will get the duty SW and she will end up doing visits from now on as manager will not be in a rush to give Sqk a new SW as he is placed and adoption order is probably only a few months away. If the life story book arrives and we are happy with it, I suspect we will be going for AO at start of February.

The following two tabs change content below.

rh

Adopter with husband T of our son Sqk. Approved at end of July 2013 and Sqk moved in in mid October 2013. Riding the roller-coaster road of adoption although in our case it is not as much of a roller-coaster as it is for many....

Latest posts by rh (see all)

Author: rh

Adopter with husband T of our son Sqk. Approved at end of July 2013 and Sqk moved in in mid October 2013. Riding the roller-coaster road of adoption although in our case it is not as much of a roller-coaster as it is for many....

Leave a Reply