I wrote on Twitter yesterday about how much both T & I feel we have reconnected with Sqk during this week and a bit away. Sqk and I travelled to train station at Escape in Castleford on Maundy Thursday to meet T after work. Having eaten we then drov north to a caravan site north of Richmond where our caravan is pitched on a seasonal pitch. We stayed here till Easter Monday and then went a bit further north to a site on the cliff to close to St Mary’s Lighthouse in North Tyneside.
This was the view out of the caravan front window at Old Hartley Caravan Club Site. T loved the fact we could Utd hear the waves crashing on the rocks and we both spent time just watching the boats on the North Sea. The causeway to the lighthouse was under water for around 3-4 hours around high tide. We walked along the cliffs most evenings although on the last night there on Friday Sqk went in his scooter and I on/off ran to keep up wth him in the rain.
Anyway although we have been places (Lindisfarne & Alnmouth Tuesday, and Newcastle Thursday) we also spent time just together as a family. Plenty of interaction between us and Sqk and I really feel like we are back to where we were getting before all the aggro of last year that has resulted in both of us having new jobs which we are both enjoying. But Sqk has only really had 6 weeks of the new routine as we did a gradual transfer from me being at home on a Friday during school time to it now being a Thursday due to all my teaching this semester being on a Friday. We both also feel that progress is visible from the sensory work we are doing. On Wednesday as we walked back from going to see the seals around the lighthouse we watched Sqk running in pretty much a stra gut line with his legs under his body rather than splaying from side to side as they did. He is also to a level a bit calmer so we shall see what impact it has on his school work this term. Also the educational psychologist is due to see Sqk soon after they go back so will be interesting to see what comes of that. I see the OT on Friday to update her on progress and to talk about what we do next to help him.
I really do feel that this holiday which is the first in over a year when I have not beeen stressing over work has helped the bond with Sqk. He is displaying less of the insecure attachment tendencies that had started to appear and is back to checking in with us and displaying more secure attachment tendencies. We are also endeavouring to mainly use natural consequences and to apply therapeutic parenting techniques. The work seems to be paying off – this week Sqk has voluntarily asked Daddy to put him to bed rather than Mummy which hasn’t happened in over a year. Daddy was fine if Mummy wasn’t about but otherwise it had to be me.
Ideally for the sake of T’s commute we could do with moving closer to his work as he at the moment has to get round, between or through one or other of the large cities we are on the edge of. My commute is further in distance terms but not really in time terms given I leave at 7am most days. However we are getting good support at school and Sqk is settled there and with his childminder we have agreed T will deal with commute at least until Sqk goes to secondary school.
All in all life is in a good place…..